15 Mar 2017

Feminist Expressions

By Ashleigh Seale

As a woman, I feel that we should be able to wear what we want when we want without being labelled or ridiculed for what we wear. Personally, I hardly wear anything short or revealing because of a lack of confidence that has been instilled in me due to men and women looking at me in a certain way or negative comments about how I look. Taking these reactions to heart is on me - for allowing them to make me feel this way, as much as it’s on them for not allowing me, my freedom of expression.

It makes me sick that some women are forced to cover up their gorgeous bodies because they are made to feel uncomfortable by men. We should not have to cover ourselves because men don’t know how to act around women showing a little skin here and there. Neither should we be harassed or be called names or made to feel ashamed of being sexy because they don’t know how to act - especially when ladies are being sexually assaulted and the excuses are that she was asking for it because she was wearing something revealing, BULLSHIT. We should be able to wear whatever we want without being afraid to go out because something might happen because of the items of clothing we choose to don.

There are ladies that would like freedom of expression without having to feel threatened or objectified! We should not be made to feel objectified simply because the male gender of our species has no “control” over their raging hormones. In spaces where men think its acceptable behaviour to cat-call ladies showing some skin (I believe that it's mostly learned behaviour from what is depicted in the media or indeed at home). That old marketing adage comes to mind - sex sells; which is effectively saying anything with a scantily dressed lady next to it will sell. Just seeing the curve of a breast - not even the whole thing - is enough to send men into a rampage of desire.

These types of behaviour need to stop. Just as men are allowed to walk around with their bare chests and shorts without being harassed by every second female spotting him, women need the same courtesy. Men need to be taught the right way to behave around a woman expressing her individuality on her own terms. Men need to be taught that respect above all is the best reaction to anything - no matter whether you agree with it, are aroused by it, or do not know how to react to it. And this starts at home. Every boy-child should be taught that skin does not mean consent – whether that is for actual sexual acts, remarks or even just staring. Every girl-child should be taught not to giggle and act flattered at these advances but to react with fire and brimstone required to shut down the thinking of those behaving this way, that their behaviour is acceptable.

No more shall we be shamed or called names for what we wear or how we’re wearing it! We shall wear our “skimpy” clothes with pride and we will not let stupid ignorant comments by men change that! You are beautiful regardless of what you wear or how short it is!

Ashleigh is a strong, confident and vibrant woman with the ability to take your thoughts and express them in a way you never saw possible. With strong feministic views this is the perfect start for her as a blogger on Content Reflections. 

Thank you and welcome Ashleigh!

Content Reflections

Desre's Bubble is now Content Reflections.... 

It was time for a change of pace and honestly a new look. I am expanding and recreating the original idea of my blog - it started out as a way for me to express myself and when I was told that my ideas and my expressions were helping people cope with everyday things, it was suggested to me that I collaborate with a friend to get more insights. 

Having given this a lot of thought I have decided to include a few people in my blog so that more thoughts could be added to my collection, because I'm not the only one living with depression, I am not the only person living with anxiety and everyone has their own coping methods and ways of learning to understand themselves. 

This being said, I open the floor to everyone else who would like to be featured in my blog, anyone out there with thoughts about what it's like to live with anxiety or simply what it's like living at all! Life has it's crazy up and down moments and sometimes we need to tell others how we feel but are unable to because your tongue has a way of getting twisted when you try to speak or you have a giant frog in your throat and literally can't - believe me this works just as well. 

So email me a sample of what you would put on the blog, I won't make you an author immediately but I will make sure to give you feedback and/or publish it under your name (or anonymous if you so please). 


Get those creative juices flowing lovelies :)

1 Mar 2017

Just apologize...

In recent weeks I've seen a few interesting articles and memes on social media about people in the wrong not apologising for their actions but rather becoming more and more distant and drifting into acquaintances and later 'that dude I used to know'. This can not be more accurate if I tried - I'm not sure how the internet knew that I needed to see this stuff but thank you to those who have shared and posted these pictures etc. Sincerely thank you...

Honestly to me it's just raw emotion that goes into a proper apology, unfiltered and pure emotion. Now, I'm not talking about that kak you give your friend when you took their last oreo and that really annoyed them that one time, I'm talking about when you've properly screwed up and betrayed your friend's trust, I'm talking about that time your friend stopped speaking to you forever because you screwed up so solidly that they literally cannot even stand the look of you anymore. I'm talking the kind of apologies we never want to give but always want to receive.

Read that last line again, swallow your pride, pick up the damn phone and just do it. We get that you thought you were right to begin with and then the friend brought it to your attention that you really were just being an asshole and now you feel really stupid but also really shit and you're hoping that it sort of just goes away with the summer, but you and I both know it won't and the next thing you know years have gone past and you haven't spoken to your friend since back when dinosaurs roamed and then it's too late because that friend has realised that they really don't need the energy vampire (yes that's you) in their life and that they are done with you. 

So do it today, phone up the long lost loved one and apologize...

Unashamed, Unapologetic, Untouchable

I have been reading a lot lately about 'strong' women that won't beg for love or won't fight for the love she deserves, she'll just get up silently and walk away or move on because the 'strong woman' is defined as knowing her worth and knowing what she will or won't accept in life.

I (personally) see myself as a strong woman, this does not mean that I don't have feelings or havn't been hurt because, while I know my worth and I know what I want out of a relationship, I have begged for love, I have crawled back with my tail between my legs, I have cried many many tears over lost lovers or even friends. I do not see myself as the world's socially defined 'strong woman' - I am my very own masterpiece and I like the person I am today.

I am loud, opinionated (often too opinionated), gasping for air while laughing my head off, unable to see straight as the tears roll down my face, flawed as fuck and you can be damn sure I am proud of the STRONG woman I am today.

Socially strong woman are these iron ladies who hold their heads up even though the world is falling apart around them, they are made out to be cold and (in my very loud opinion) heartless. I am made to feel ashamed because I cried my heart out when my first 'real' boyfriend broke my heart and I had the audacity to try and fix what I thought I had. I felt belittled by posts I saw on instagram and facebook about strong woman who won't beg for anything because I literally begged my boyfriend a few years ago to take me back. I am now unashamed and proud to say that I couldn't give two shits what anyone might define me as because of so called weak moments in my life - you call them weak, I call them character defining ballsy moves because I put my heart on the line and it was crushed.

I have overcome so much in my 23 years in existence and I am delighted with how I've turned out - I have stumbled, crawled and probably fell face first into a puddle of mud (metaphorically people) so many times I can't even count it anymore. I am a good person. I know what I want out of life and I will not put others down for not wanting the same things as me.

I am a strong, blatantly human, woman and if anyone has a problem with that... they really shouldn't make it mine because it has nothing to do with me what other people *THINK* they know about me.